Some people never learn

But listen to the music, Marge! He's evil! (Homer Simpson)

My little mountain hideaway is more or less under siege at the moment, by a bunch of ridiculously earnest people in expensive suits and with improbable teeth. Ten years ago at Christmas a six-year-old girl was strangled to death. It was obviously a bit of a slow-news day that Christmas, no decent wars or anything, so a media circus descended on the town in a frenzy of speculation and hairspray. Boulder County Police Department are worthless sacks of shit at the best of times, and being Christmas they were clearly more interested in getting pissed and photocopying the Dispatcher's tits than making a decent fist of a murder investigation. Consequently, they just blamed the nearest suspects (the parents), and let the news companies get on with the trial. The police are big on efficiency here (i.e. idleness), and letting idiots like Geraldo try the case saves all that tedious messing around with judges, lawyers, courtrooms and evidence. Admittedly, the parents had some fairly odd views on parenting (calling your child JonBenet is a bit iffy, as is dressing up a six-year-old in Paris Hilton's party dress), so there was just enough material to insinuate all sorts of parental misdemeanors.

The things is, almost anybody competent who's investigated the whole affair has been persistently confident that the parents had nothing to do with it. You'd think that these so-called journalists would have learned their lesson and started indulging in a bit of good, old-fashioned fact checking and restraint. Apparently not. Some oddball has been picked up in Bangkok as a suspect, but before the D.A. has even charged the man (contrary what the LA Times thinks) his name's already being dragged through the mud. Tried, convicted and sentenced by a jury of 300 million gaping-mouthed cretins.

Back in the UK, it's illegal to name a suspect until you've actually charged them, just the sort of wishy-washy liberal attitude that apparently allows twelve-year-olds to wantonly board aeroplanes at will. A friend of mine was horrified to discover that some of the hundreds of terrorist suspects arrested in the UK this summer may actually have to released if no firm evidence is found against them, instead of packing them off to Guantanamo Bay where, I'm sure, a 'confession' could be acquired. (Mind you, he thinks Tony Blair is a communist for even tolerating the existence of a National Health Service, which is a delightful irony). He comes from a town called Normal, IL, which may or may not be significant.

Update!
Doh!