Exclusive: Mayor of New Orleans an Oompa Loompa!

The investigations into the havoc wreaked by Hurricane Katrina have begun in earnest now, and predictably the media are whipping themselves up into their very own category five maelstrom. Not one to miss a financial opportunity, I've opened a sweepstake on when the term 'Katrina-gate' is going to appear first (email the Captain's mailbox for details). When all's said and done though, the only thing that's remarkable about this catalogue of incompetence and financial tom-foolery is just how depressingly unsurprising it all is.

More exciting is the commentary provided by Ray Nagin, Mayor of what's left of New Orleans. His brain seems to have the knack of breaching his own mental levees of common sense and releasing devastating torrents of muddy water. His latest comments include the assertion that the rebuilt New Orleans should be a 'chocolate' city.

I'm not convinced. I love Willy Wonka as much as the next man (in a purely platonic sense, of course), but wouldn't chocolate melt in the sultry climate of the Big Easy? That might add a bit more sauciness to Mardi Gras, I grant you, but I can't see the it doing much for the longevity of the city, or indeed it's already obese inhabitants.

Mark my words, if they rebuild it in chocolate they'll be swimming in their own gumbo by nightfall.