I've been in this Godawful city too long

"Ok, so here's the deal, we can let the chatterati do the climate sensing but dude, I gotta tell you it's av-caffeine all the way. We send Condoleezza Rice to Paris with about 15 eligible batchelors to choose a future husband. Each week she boots one of them off and they have to go and live in a flat with 5 other dysfunctional wannabe B-list celebs, with only a crate of wine and 5,324 minicams for company. The last one remaining is supposed to marry Condoleezza, but here's the twist - he only then learns that it's not in fact the Secretary of State, but is actually a pre-op transexual Mardi Gras Queen living in a FEMA trailer in Houston, TX. If he exchanges vows with the poof he gets a million bucks, if not he has to go duck shooting with Dick Cheney. Will Cheney shoot him, or will he miss? The audience is on tenterhooks, I tell ya! If he does get shot in the face, he's whisked straight off to the operating room where Larry King, who's been given the (televised) challenge of learning how to become a doctor in one week, performs surgery. The real surgeon is, of course, learning how to become a figure skater with Nancy Kerrigan. It may not be reality, but it's certainly TV!"